It is the month of January and your dad and I started with our Bible Reading Plan. I didn’t have to read very far to come across God’s first instructions about marriage.
“Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.”
Genesis 2:18
Right from the start of creation and the very first union to ever exist, between Adam and Eve, God laid the foundation for marriage. It has always been God’s original design and intent; woman as the helper. The woman, made to help, aid, assist and relieve the man in his God-given task of filling, multiplying and taking dominion over the earth.
We are the ones to come alongside our men and help them in all ways possible to live out that which God has called them to. And in doing so, we will be bringing glory to God and fulfilling His original design plan. The world will continually try to convince women of some other alternative and will talk not-so-subtly about equality and women’s rights. Our culture will subtly try to suggest a more modern way of shared responsibility and equal roles. But God’s word is clear-we, as women, were made to help.
As Christians our lives, and therefore our marriages, should be modelled after God’s design. It is a matter of knowing what the Bible says, believing it and living it out. His design is perfect. He is the Creator. We are His creation. And it is in obedience to Him that joy is found.
“This job has been given to me to do. Therefore, it is a gift. Therefore, it is a privilege. Therefore, it is an offering I may make to God. Therefore, it is to be done gladly, if it is done for Him. Here, not somewhere else, I may learn God’s way. In this job, not in some other, God looks for faithfulness. “ -Elisabeth Elliot
As we are faithful to God and His Word, we bring Him honour and simultaneously bless our husbands. As we purpose to obey God’s Word we become like the wise woman in Proverbs who “does him (her husband) good and not evil, all the days of her life.” (Proverbs 31:12). It starts with a heart set on obedience and spills over into a life of service and great blessing.
Living out this instruction in God’s Word is straightforward - simply make it your mission in marriage to serve your husband in every way possible. You are there to help him, aid him, assist him and relieve him, not the other way around.
Constantly look for ways you can lighten his load. Serve him joyfully. Help accompanied by grumbling or secret resentment is no blessing at all.
So what will “help” look like in practice?
Always try to answer with a cheerful “yes” to his requests.
Prioritise the tasks he assigns to you, remember you are the confidant he can safely trust.
Make his life comfortable in as many sweet little ways as possible-lay out clothes for him, have delicious meals ready on time, prepare a plate for him, keep a clean and cosy home, love and care for the needs of the children.
If you know he has a project looming that you could handle, do it for him.
Learn new skills to free him up from some responsibilities at home.
Be willing to invest time and effort in his passions and hobbies.
On and on the list could go… But the most important thing to remember in all these acts of service to your man is to put on a cheerful heart and do it all in a spirit of gentleness. Be grace to him.
Charles Spurgeon describes a true wife as “her husband’s better half, his lump of delight, his flower of beauty, his guardian angel and his heart’s treasure.”
Purpose in your heart to be this kind of wife and to bring sunshine to his days. And do it all gracefully; doing all the good you can,as Dickens said, and making as little fuss about it as possible.
Dear daughter, look to Jesus as your model of true servanthood as you strive to help your beloved in all things. And may you become an excellent wife and crown to your husband (Proverbs 12:4).
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